


A sky that blooms yellow

by frappu_chi_no



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Character Death, Coping, F/M, Love, Post-War, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-15 18:48:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29688363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frappu_chi_no/pseuds/frappu_chi_no
Summary: Mercedes/OCShe never had to worry with him there; he was reliable, held her close, worried not of her status, her crest- but worried about his own.They held each other's hearts when it mattered most, when war led them to battle classmates they once held dear.But in the midst of it all, what happens when he's gone?
Relationships: Mercedes von Martritz/Original Male Character(s)
Kudos: 1





	A sky that blooms yellow

**Author's Note:**

> Hi!!! Thanks for checking in. This is definitely a Post-War relationship between Mercedes and my OC, Sindre Wrendren. I'll post a story about who he is later, but this is his and Mercie's end story in a bad ending (Crimson Flower).  
> Some info:  
> Sijur is Sindre's oldest brother, and Stefan is also his older brother. Sylvi is his younger sister. Iris is married to Sijur, and Piper is married to Stefan. That should cover it!  
> Thanks for checking it out!

Mercedes had told Sindre time and time again, in a joking, loving matter, that she never liked to exercise- to run.

_“Well, you won’t need to.”_

Her feet hit the dirt as fast as she could. The air stank of blood. Or was it her clothes? She couldn’t even tell if it was white anymore. Her feet hurt. Her lungs burned, made her gasp for air as she kept her pace. She didn’t know how long she had been running. Her hair was certainly a mess. She had lost her hat somewhere on the plains. The sky was musky.

_“Because I’ll take you up on my horse.”_

She thinks of the green brooch in her hands- engraved with the Wrendren crest- Chevalier. The color of his eyes. The color of the grass around the estate. The color of the trees when they first met in the spring at Garreg Mach. She is wrought with the feeling of his hands as he lifted her onto his horse to go into town with her.

_“And we can ride around the grasslands all you want.”_

She’s sweating, and all she can think about is his voice. She heaves- she has no idea where she is, but she’s desperate. Desperate to find a way out of the prairie and the forest before an enemy spots her. But the soldiers are long gone- at least she hopes so. She waited long enough, pretending to be dead, before running away. Leaving his body there.

_Cold._

* * *

It’s evening as Mercedes collapses on the ground. She doesn’t know how far she’d run. The Tailtean plains lies northeast of Gideon, Wrendren territory. Gideon is one of the largest territories in Faerghus- it is grassland upon grassland, with small towns dotting it’s landscape, and House Wrendren in the north, closest to Fhirdidad as you can get in the territory. Perhaps a half a day’s march from the Tailtean plains.

She hears his voice again, strained, bloody, choked, quiet. Feels his hand against her back, feels his blood coating her chest, his weight bearing so, so heavy on her.

He’s dying. She can’t heal him.

_Sindre._

She’s so tired. She tries so hard to keep the image of his face in her head, trying so hard to hear his voice over and over, but she’s crying so hard at this point that she can’t see through the blur of her tears.

“ _Mercie!-” His voice is like a cry for help, a plea, strained with pain. Mercedes didn’t even see it happen- it happened so, so fast. She was in front of him- he had gotten knocked off his horse- almost impossible- not even Sylvain nor Felix could ever do that. He was on the ground, and she didn’t notice the man come with a spear- he covered her so quickly, she thought that that had both dodged. His weight was heavy on her, so she didn’t know what to do until-_

_“Don’t move.” She heard him whisper. The spear had gone completely through his stomach. She felt the metal against her waist- it had slashed through her clothes, but didn’t touch her skin. Sindre took the entire hit. His breaths were so, so heavy. The blood from the wound was soaking through her clothes completely, that her skin felt wet and warm from his blood. Her hand shook as she wrapped them around him, feeling the hilt of the spear, feeling the hot flesh exposed underneath the cloth. The enemy left the weapon in him, leaving them- assuming that he had stabbed through them both, she supposed._

_Only Sindre. Only her gentle giant._

_“I need to heal you-” Mercedes gasped, eyes trying to focus on his face._

_“No.” His breath was so thick. He was shaking, no strength to even keep his body up against her. Sindre’s entire weight was on her- and she felt suffocated- but his weight was not the only reason why. “They’ll see the healing.” He says curtly, and Mercedes has never heard him speak this way. He then starts spouting nonsense. Commands, but Mercedes knows what they are. Wishes of a man who knows he’s dead. She’s heard it so many times this war. “Lay here for as long as possible.” His breaths are starting to become unbearably even- he’s trying to stay calm for her. She wants to start crying. But there are soldiers passing them by. His voice remains so, so low. “It’s over, Mercie. We won’t have to fight anymore.” His eyes are so blurry. They’re exhausted looking. Almost blank. But he manages a sweet, tiny smile. The smile she loved more than anything. “Our dream.”_

_“Sindre-” Mercedes is breathing so light she feels like she isn’t taking any breaths at all._

_“When I die, take the brooch back to the estate. Go there. Don’t-” he sputters, red spilling out of his lips. “Don’t look back.”_

_“No-”_

_“Find Iris and Piper. They’ll keep you safe-”_

_“-Not without you-” She cries, but his tone is so steady, he’s so calm- hes dying right on top of her and she can’t do-_

_“-I love you…. Please… “ His voice pauses for what feels like an eternity, and she can’t believe this is the end. “You’re all I’ve ever wanted.” Sindre’s voice now can’t be more than the whispering of the trees. She sees tears fall out of his soft features as his eyes close. But he smiles. The smile she fell in love with in the first place. She wants to scream so loud. She can’t. Because then him protecting her would mean nothing. “Mercie…”_

_“Sindre…” She moves her face close to his- feeling his warmth- feeling his breath- as it stops leaving his lips._

_And she lays there._

* * *

Two months of reliving that moment every time she closed her eyes. Two months of trying to keep him in her memory. Thinking back, it was a miracle she reached the estate as soon as she did. A week, was it?

Mercedes had ran for days and days without stop - she was terrified. The only thing she could focus on was getting to the estate but ...what did it look like again? She couldn’t remember. She didn’t want to remember. The servants had found the weary healer staggering towards the estate through the open back. Her hair was a mess, her eyes looked lifeless, skin ghostly pale, her once beautiful cream and brown robes were tainted with the deep red blood of her husband ...and the smell, gods, the horrendous smell. She was sure that she would never forget it. Her boots were covered with mud and dirt. She saw the gates of the estate- gasping for breath. She collapsed on the property, knowing at last where she was, and that for now, she would be safe. In the husk of her collapse, she could hear the bustle of servants finding her-

 _“Lad- Lady…- Lady Mercedes-”_ the voices felt all but distant. Even though her eyes were closed now, she could see Sindre’s smiling face. She felt almost haunted- but these weren’t her ghost stories. His words echoed in her mind every day, all day as she tried to painfully recall his final words.

… _I love you ….Please… You’re all I’ve ever wanted._

_Mercie._

* * *

Mercedes blinked away the lethargy of morning. She was alone, on _their_ bed. It had been a month since the Empire had taken over all governments- for now, the nobility were left alone to their devices. The war was over- but she couldn’t help over and over again to believe at what cost. All her friends were dead- save Annette and Ashe. All of them were having a hard time adjusting- all of their significant others were… dead. The Kingdom had been taken over by Edelgard- and her heart tinged with the loss of their king… Dimitri.

Life around the estate didn’t feel real. Sindre’s parents took the loss heavily, but encouraged Mercedes to stay, as she was his wife- and that would have been his wish. His funeral was awful. The Empire had allowed families to go back and retrieve bodies from the battlefield- customary of any war, if a society was honorable. And even though the Empire took everything from her… They gave her that mercy. She and Stefan had went, alone, to recover Sindre and Sylvi’s bodies. Mercedes almost couldn’t walk on the plains, but with Stefan’s hand, they walked together- to where she knew he would be. Finding him made her throw up immediately. Of course- Of course it looked nothing like him. But the imagery of his flesh and the spear in his stomach- thinking of the man who was nothing but tender and kind, killed in such a horrific way… She did not even want to know about the others. When she tried to look away, Stefan and Mercedes realized that not too far away, was Sylvi, looking burnt alive, hand reaching for her brother. Mercedes did not want to even imagine what her final moments were like.

The week after that was just as bad. The funerals for the two youngest Wrendren children sucked the life out of Mercedes- for her, she couldn’t imagine joy any longer. Even the rest of the Wrendren family was having a hard time. Sijur, Sindre, and Sylvi. The only one left was Stefan. He had no siblings anymore. What could she do for him? Or even herself? How could she enjoy anything anymore? Nothing felt the same.

Rina, Sindre’s personal servant, became her’s. Every day, Rina would knock once, twice, then she would slowly open the door, then come into the room. She would open the blinds, prepare Mercedes a cup of tea and sweets. But nothing tasted the same anymore. Before, Sindre would prepare the tea… on days Mercedes wanted to sleep in, he would chuckle and make her any sweet she wanted. And he would always do it so gently, so lovingly. So it was hard to see someone else- even Rina, the one who taught Sindre how to bake- it never felt the same. She rose from the bed, almost wanting to feel the sheets one more time. They didn’t smell like him anymore. For the two months that she had been back home, she hadn’t opened their drawers, afraid to let the feeling of him being alive leave her.

“Milady?” Mercedes heard Rina say from the tea table. “Did you hear me?”

“Oh.” Mercedes looked over, eyes tired but still warm looking. “Did you need something, Rina?”

“Lady Iris and Lady Piper wanted to meet you today. Will you be able to?” Mercedes didn’t forget things often before the war. She cared about meeting others on time. Seeing other people. Now, she never did. The only person she ever wanted to see was Annette. She missed Sindre in every moment of her life. She missed Sylvi’s smile. She missed Dedue watering flowers. Or putting makeup on Ingrid. Talking to Dimitri. Chiding Sylvain. But she knew Iris felt the same way- losing her own husband at the beginning of the war. She also knew that Piper was in an uncomfortable position. All the wives knew that Sindre was the heir. Now that he was gone, it was assumed to be Stefan. But if any of Sijur’s children developed a crest, what would happen then? The wives didn’t know. 

“Yes, I should be. Is it for tea?”

“I believe so. The children will be there as well.” Rina said, going to the closet to pull out a dress for her. “The weather will bode well for you, milady. It will be good for you to get some sunlight.”

Emotionally, Mercedes never felt the same. She felt awful for feeling like she was using Sindre’s family to take care of her. But Iris and Piper always went out of their ways to keep her company when they could.

Begrudgingly, Mercedes sits up on her bed .Nausea has taken her recently, but she blames it on fatigue. Pain from losing her love. Mental scarring from seeing her beloved’s body torn apart. Hate from herself for not dying alongside him, like they promised in their vows. Anxiety from having to keep up with his family, because she wants to, because she wants to desperately hold on to them- the only piece of Sindre she has left. She shifts over slowly to the table by the window, where Rina has prepared some tea. Sindre's chair from across from her remains just as he left it before their final battle- with a blanket he liked to sit with, fluffy, made from wool from farmers on the Gideon Plains- a man of his people.

 _I miss you._ She thinks to herself. She wants to feel his soft blonde hair under the palms of her hands, wants to hear his chuckle when he throws flour at her. She wants to hide under the sheets with him, kiss his head before he wakes up, press her cheek to his in the cold winter of Faerghus. Iris and Piper had made it easier to adjust, but she couldn't help but feel like she was burdening them. Sijur was also dead, yet Iris handled it with so much poise. 

Yet three months after the battle at the Tailtean plains, Mercedes’ mental state had only slightly improved. Her body is worse. She’s looked better- she hadn't touched her makeup since the war began, really. She’s gained some weight- which is surprising, considering she doesn’t think she’s eating as much as she should. Or that some mornings she’s so nauseous she can barely stand. But Rina always makes sure shes at least eating something. She’s always thirsty. Her feet still have sores from when she ran back to the Wrendren estate. 

She wonders, briefly, when she’ll start feeling better. Rina changes the bedsheets as she takes a sip of the tea- it was basically tasteless. She was holding the Wrendren brooch in her fingertips, admiring the green peridot gem.

“Lady Mercedes?” She asked pensively. Mercedes turned around, quiet, but curious at what her maid was questioning. She was holding the sheets. “Did you… have your monthly bleed, milady?” Rina asked. The confusion bloomed quickly over Mercedes’ face. She couldn’t have hidden it- she didn’t expect to be asked.

_How could she have forgotten?_

“Ah, Pardon me- its just I also take care of Lady Iris and Lady Piper at times, and it is just something I happened to notice.” Rina said quickly. "If you are in need of anything regarding that, please let me know.

“Well-”

“Perhaps it is stress… You have been dealing with plenty, lately… Considering the duties of the household and with… With only Stefan here…” Rina trailed off, but she could tell that Mercedes had recoiled back at her words. _Only Stefan._ Rina bowed respectfully. “My apologies, milady- I will be taking my leave.”

Mercedes watched Rina leave, closing the door slowly behind her as she looked herself in the mirror. Was it truly stress? Mercedes had been at war for the past five years or so. It wasn’t like it ever stopped her periods. She had been fed much worse than she was being fed now- but how could she have neglected her health to the point where she didn’t notice one of the most _normal_ bodily functions she had? The loss of Sindre made her sleep often. She threw up thinking of foods he liked to eat. She got headaches often, needed to drink water, but she hadn’t thought much further than grief.

She thinks of the last time she laid with Sindre. It was likely before they left the monastery for the plains. She thinks of it closely- his hair, roused and almost glowing in their bedroom, his eyes hungry but ever gentle, his hips flush with hers, hands eager- him whispering to her, holding her tightly against his body- that hopefully-

 _“Hopefully, this will be our last battle… and we can go home, and start our family.”_

Tears well up into her eyes before she can control it. 

“Gods, no-” Mercedes cries, writhing over herself in her seat. She's trembling, and she can feel her bones chill. “ _No-”_ Her wail permeates the walls of their room. Tears drip down her face, and she sees it on her dress. Hands shaking, she touches her stomach- oh, so gingerly, reciting a spell she learned while working at churches in Gideon- to check the magic capacity of women’s wombs- that turns white when life force is being repelled back, golden when healing wounds. She prays to Sothis, lips trembling with worry as she finishes the spell.

She wants it to turn golden. A piece of her heart hopes it will be white.

The magic on her fingertips glitters white.

“ _No!”_ She screams, holding her head in her hands, choked sobs coming out of her throat. Back then, she loved to see the beautiful white glow of the magic spell. It was… a blessing from the Goddess Sothis herself. But now, she can only feel remorse. “ _Sindre-_ ” What she wouldn’t have given to have him there. To hold her. To spin her in his arms with joy. He always loved children. He always dreamed of them- with her- to have a child together. But she can’t bring her heart to be elated. How? How could she ever raise his child? Without him? “Not without you…” She whispers.

There's a knock at the door, and it has a sense of urgency to it. Mercedes sits up, alert, trying to wipe her tears before the door bursts open.

It’s Iris.

Sijur’s wife rushes to her side before she can blink. She’s kneeling, something normally unbecoming for a beautiful, elegant noblewoman like herself. But she’s none of those things right now. She’s holding Mercedes’ hands. Iris is looking at her eyes, blue meeting lavender, when the tears keep coming.

“What’s wrong, Mercedes?” Iris whispers slowly. Mercedes remembers in her head- both Iris and Piper are mothers to children. Iris’ children were so much older now- Finn was twelve, Kenneth was nine, and Espen was eight. Piper and Stefan’s children were girls- Aria, who was now ten, and Leah, who was seven. Their children were almost carbon copies of their husbands- would Mercedes be able to handle that? Would she see Sindre in their child’s eyes, every day? She let out a sob, choking on the sound as Iris led her to stand to sit on her bed. 

“Rina fetched me. She said you did not look well. You seem awfully frail today." Iris says, holding her head, pulling Mercedes' hair back. "Should we bring a healer for you? You know better to take after your health.” Iris murmured, feeling Mercedes’s forehead, touching her clammy skin. 

“I- I-” Mercedes stammered, shaking. She couldn’t even process her own words- “I just… don’t know what to do, Iris.” Though vague, Iris already knew- or at least Mercedes assumed she knew that she was talking about Sindre.

“I know… I know that feeling too well. That he feels here, but he's not? That you wish he is?” Iris replied, and for that moment, Mercedes looked at her for the first time and saw an unbelieveable sadness in her eyes- skies that looked like they would shatter in an instant, and it was gone. How did she overcome it? That grief that washes over her every moment. The feeling of _why couldn't it have been me?_ “That feeling… Never goes away. Especially not with how the household is. But… you remember the things that matter most. And you live, for new things.” Iris explains, smiling. Mercedes eyes her wedding ring- still glittering on Iris’ hand. “My children… keep me alive.” Iris says, rubbing Mercedes’ hand, encouraging her to take deep breaths. “Should I have Rina fetch you some water? Perhaps for now-”

“I’m pregnant, Iris.” Mercedes croaks out. Her face feels crusted with her tears, and her eyes feel swollen. But she can clearly see Iris’ eyes grow wide. 

“It’s been three months since-”

“It was before. We…” Mercedes finds it in her to blush a little, but it makes her lips tremble to think of Sindre holding her tender. “I probably… conceived then….” She whispers, holding back a sob deep in her throat. “But I- without him-”

Iris envelopes her in a tight embrace before Mercedes can keep talking. Her hands tighten around her back, hushing her as Mercedes finds herself sobbing. Through her voice, she hears Iris talk. “It may be without him, but you’re not alone. Mercedes, our family is here for _you._ ”

* * *

The months fade into seasons and Mercedes finds herself walking in Sylvi’s rosegarden. The flowers have been kept to pristine shape- Stefan had a statue of Sylvi made in her honor- it sits in the gazebo in the middle, amongst her favorite flowers- the red ones. A similar statue of Sindre sits on the west end of the garden. Rina had been ordered to not leave Mercedes’ side during her pregnancy. The swell of her belly is larger than ever- She is teetering somewhere around 8 months through. She sits idly, listening to the flow of the wind through the shrubbery. She observes the beautiful skies of summer in the Kingdom- it might not be called that anymore, but she likes to imagine Sindre’s old realities. 

“ _My sister has a whole little garden at home. Someday, I’d like to take you to it.”_

The longer since Sindre’s passing, the more she remembers of small nuances in their relationship. Bits she wished she cherished more. 

_“There are sunflowers towards my part of the estate that I planted myself. Those are-”_

“Your favorite.” Mercedes whispers to herself, but Rina overhears her.

“Pardon, milady?”

“Oh. I was just remembering something Sindre told me when we were young.” She replies. Her maid has a torn smile on her face, but she comes over to her to ask.

“May I know?”

“His favorite flowers should bloom soon, right? It’s the middle of the summer.” 

“That’s right. The sunflowers. They should bloom any week now. The gardener has been tending to it.” Rina nods.

“Let’s go see them right now. I want to sit near his statue for a bit.” Mercedes gets up on her feet, heavy, but slowly truds her way over to the other side of the garden, stepping slow as to not wear herself out. As they approach the sunflowers, Mercedes is greeted by the smiles of yellow. They’re open- barely. “Oh, how wonderful.” She smiles, then looks up at the sky to pray a little. “Sindre must’ve known we wanted to see them today.” 

Rina is silent, but smiles all the same. Mercedes walks closer to the statue there- it is tall and elegant, featuring him in his military garb- not particularly his favorite. But the statue is holding flowers. Sunflowers, lilies, and roses. His hair is in a loose braid behind his head- something Mercedes used to take joy in doing every morning for him while they were at war. The statue depicts him at peace.

Something Mercedes prays for everyday.

Eight months had made time slip through her fingers. She remembered it as though it was just barely an hour ago, but an eternity past. She remembers the feeling of his hands on her face, his eyes on hers, and the color of his hair. The taste of his cookies- the graze of his fingertips as he passed her in the halls... The sound of his laughter, deep, musical, happy.

_“I love you, Mercie.”_

She doesn’t forget it.


End file.
